A sample shot
Well, here’s another sample shot I wrote today. This is more in line with what Agi (a friend) says I write.
~*~*~
Once more the nightmares came. And once more he hastened to her side, reaching out a hand to gently brush her cheek. The young woman stiffened, then jerked awake, her eyes tracking as she came to herself.
“Ril,” he said gently, using the old pet name. “Same nightmares?”
“Indeed,” Ril said, wrapping her arms around herself, shivering. “Why hasn’t it left me alone, Ro? It’s been five years already.”
Ro made a move as Ril brought back his own pet name, hands searching for tools he no longer carried with him. Ril gave a small smile, but waited patiently. “Ril… seventeen years of suffering isn’t easily erased or put behind you. You know better than I what happened. Do you really think that you’d get over it quickly?”
“I don’t want it to rule my life… any part of my life,” Ril insisted.
“And you’ve made excellent progress,” said Ro. “That first year, you wouldn’t let me near you, no matter what. You didn’t want to be hurt again.”
“I let you through,” Ril said, swallowing hard. “It was either going to be the best… or worst decision I’d ever made.”
“You did,” said Ro. “And slowly, we progressed. There’s nothing you hide from me, now. Except your nakedness. And I know it’s not because you think you’re not pretty…”
“I know I’m not pretty,” said Ril shortly. “How could I be, after my fucking father did what he did to me, Ro?! He hurt me!”
“I know in words what he did, Ril… except you’ve never really told me. You always stopped short of actually naming what he did to you. Will you show me?” Ro asked gently. Ril looked at him, fear evident in her eyes, but at last she nodded and snapped off the light. There came a rustling as she shed her nightie and then the sound of her lying on her stomach. A hand reached out, placing it on her panties.
“Up.”
The word was simple. Ro obeyed, his fingers travelling up, then freezing as his fingers touched skin that just felt wrong. Venturing along the skin, he swallowed hard as he encountered more skin that felt wrong. He soon figured out that Ril’s entire back was this way. Following some of the more prominent traces, they went around her side. Ril rolled over wordlessly, letting him following the traces to their end on her stomach and breasts.
“What are they?” Ro asked gently, withdrawing his hands. Oh, he had his suspicions, but better to let her name it.
“Scars,” Ril whispered. “Dozens and dozens of scars. Some faint, some deep. Some stark, some shallow. But they’re all there, Ro. I know each and every one of them. He beat me, Ro. Nothing I did was good enough.” Her voice quavered. “Every night, I’d done something wrong. Something that earnt me the belt… or the whip. And I couldn’t get away. I tried that once. He beat me to an inch of my life. Never tried that again.”
Ro squeezed her hand reassuringly. “What else?”
“I got punished once for not feeding the dog,” Ril said, looking at him.
Ro stiffened. “You never had a dog.”
“I know,” said Ril, her voice half breaking before going on in a whisper. “Seventeen years of it, Ro. And I’m shattered. I tried for so long to hold it in, to be strong. And it all fell apart once I was out of there. Where’s my courage, my strength?”
“Ril… no one can be strong for that long without it hurting them. You have to let things out, you can’t keep them inside. They need to be released. And now, you have that chance to release it. Whether you meant to or not, you’ve taken that chance,” Ro said quietly, squeezing her hand.
“But if I’m weak, I’ll be hurt again,” Ril said, her eyes wide with fear.
“Then all the better to give into the weakness now, where you’re safe and let yourself work through all your pain and past so you can be strong again,” Ro said. “If you hold it in, you’re never going to be whole again.”
Ril shivered, pulling the blankets around herself, allowing Ro to pull her into a hug. There would be time later to speak more. For now, they were together. And that was enough.
Comments